So, you’re ready to say buh-bye to the pacifier. Great! Just one problem? Your child is not.
A pacifier is such a great comfort to a child and is so useful when they’re small. But there does come a time when it’s best to say goodbye. But how? How do you take that comfort away from your child and their puppy dog eyes? How do you get them to fall asleep without it? How do you calm them quickly? Such a dilemma. But it doesn’t have to be that hard.
This post will tell you how to make this difficult time a little less difficult.
Step 1. Acknowledge their feelings
A pacifier is a great comfort and will definitely be missed at first. There is nothing wrong with acknowledging this with your child and how it has helped them. But you can also explain why it’s time to say goodbye, so they understand there’s a purpose to this madness. You can let them know that now that they’re bigger it’s better for their teeth if they don’t use it, their speech, and now they are big enough to not need it anymore. A key here might be to highlight their strengths and make them feel empowered to give it up. “You’re a big girl now” and “you talk so good, we want to hear you talk even more” or “your teeth are so nice we want to make sure they stay nice” and “I know you can fall asleep without it because you’re such a big boy now and you can do anything!”
Every child is different so adapt what you say to fit what will work with your child.
Hopefully they agree to try and you can then proceed to step 2…
Step 2. Choose a method & go with it.
Method 1: Your child throws it in the trash on their own.
Some kids are willing to help you throw it away after the empowerment speech. They’ll toss it right in the garbage, help you take that garbage outside and watch the garbage truck take it away. This really helps them understand that it’s gone, not coming back, and it’s time to move on without it. If they ask for it, you can remind them they threw it away. This method can help them feel even more empowered and grown up and can be great for their self-confidence.
I know many kids who did it this way. My own child did not fully grasp the whole idea and it didn’t really work for him.
If it doesn’t work for your child, no problem. We’ve got other methods up our sleeves!
Method 2: Pacifier fairy.
You’ve heard of the tooth fairy but have you heard of the pacifier fairy?
At a certain age, the pacifier fairy comes and takes away your child’s pacifier while they’re sleeping and leaves behind a gift in it’s place. How magical!
This method is great for kids who may be more reluctant to simply throw it away on their own. It can be a gentle approach and make it easier on a parent as well!
When they ask for it, remind them of the fairy and if their gift was a different type of comfort item you can offer them that instead. I actually just thought of that now but that’s a great idea. Get them a new comfort item as a gift such as a stuffed toy!
This method could work on kids who understand the concept of a fairy and what happened. If your child struggles to understand storytelling at this stage it may not be the best method for them.
Method 3: Send to kids in need.
I’ve heard of other parents doing this method. They explain to their child that now that they’re bigger, they can send their pacifier to younger kids/babies who need one to help them out. This can help instil humanitarian values in your child from a young age and make them feel empowered to help others with nothing in it for themselves. A great lesson at a young age… if they can understand it, that is.
If none of these methods seem like they’ll work for your child, there are more gradual methods you can try….
Method 4: The gradual limitation method
With this method you don’t take the pacifier away cold turkey. Instead, you explain to them that since they’re getting bigger they need to slowly limit how much they use it and eventually stop all together. You then set limits on WHEN they get to use it- only a bed time and nap time for example. Then maybe they don’t get it for naps anymore. Then not for bed time anymore and eventually you phase it out completely.
To me this sounds like a nice idea, but I can’t really picture how you gradually take it away for bedtime – it seems it would still have to be one night where it’s just gone but you can figure out what works best for your child and give it a try.
And lastly, the method I personally used with my son and it worked well…
Method 5: Cut a hole in the end.
My child didn’t really grasp the other more elaborate storylines to say bye to his pacifier and taking it away cold turkey seemed too harsh. So I did the cut-a-hole-in-it method and let him still use it all he wanted!
Of course, it just wasn’t the same. He’d still get it to sleep but would spit it out pretty quickly and managed to get to sleep on his own.
Eventually, it got knocked it under the bed, and never looked for again.
He’d ask every now and then and I’d say we lost it and by then he didn’t care that much anyway.
Every child is different so choose the method that works best for your child.
How to handle the sleep problems and tantrums, etc??
They may be extra fussy for a few days. They may have more trouble getting to sleep. Don’t hesitate to offer them extra comfort in other ways while they adjust. Offer them another comfort item. Remind them of what a big kid they are now and how proud of them you.
But whatever you do: Stay consistent.
Don’t bring it back from the fairy or the post office or the trash!
They WILL adjust!
I hope this helped. Let me know how YOU got rid of your child’s pacifier and what worked and what didn’t!
